Movie ratings that actually work

 

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The Giver - 2.4.1

Set in the future, after a catastrophe, the film describes a utopian society where an all-powerful Council of Elders controls everything and all actions are carefully controlled in an attempt to avoid all conflict by removing race, love, sex, ambition, color art and individuality. The Giver (Jeff Bridges) serves as the repository of global memories and advisor, until he grows old and must train a younger replacement, a teen boy (Brenton Thwaites). Based on Lois Lowry’s 1993 Newbery Medal-winning young adult novel. Also with Meryl Streep, Odeya Rush, Katie Holmes, Taylor Swift, Cameron Monaghan and Alexander Skarsgård. Directed by Phillip Noyce. [1:35 - PG-13]

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Calvary - 6.6.6

A Catholic priest (Brendan Gleeson) in a small Irish town is told by a parishioner during confession that he will be murdered in one week as an act of retribution for sexual child abuse by Catholic priests. Also struggling with alcoholism, the priest tries to deal with a bewildering and challenging situation. Also with Chris O'Dowd, Kelly Reilly, Aidan Gillen, Dylan Moran, Isaach De Bankolé, M. Emmet Walsh, Marie-Josée Croze, Domhnall Gleeson, David Wilmot, Pat Shortt, Gary Lydon, Killian Scott, Orla O'Rourke and Owen Sharpe. Directed by John Michael McDonagh. [1:40 - R]

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Land Ho! - 5.2.5

Two divorced aging men (Paul Eenhoom and Earl Lynn Nelson) embark on a road trip to Iceland in search of lost youth. Once brothers-in-law, the duo survives a number of exploits in the rocky outer landscapes and Reykjavík, confronting loneliness, mortality and renewal. Also with Alice Olivia Clarke, Karrie Crouse, Elizabeth McKee, Emmsje Gauti, Magnus Kr. Guðmundsson and Prudur Kristjansdottir. Directed by Aaron Katz & Martha Stephens. [1:36 - R]

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The Expendables 3 - 2.6.5

In this third installment Sylvester Stallone stars as the mercenary leader of a reduced force after several members have died. A powerful nemesis (Mel Gibson) reappears unexpectedly, forcing him to recruit a group of younger team members, although other mature action stars join in. Also with Antonio Banderas, Harrison Ford, Jason Statham, Wesley Snipes, Dolph Lundgren, Randy Couture, Terry Crews, Kelsey Grammar, Arnold Schwarzenegger and Jet Li. Directed by Patrick Hughes. A few lines of dialogue are in a Slavic language with English subtitles. [1:50 - PG-13]

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What If - 6.4.5

Frustrated by another failed love affair a man (Daniel Radcliffe) becomes cynical about relationships. Then he meets a woman (Zoe Kazan) at a party but she tells him that she has a boyfriend and so he must be satisfied to be her friend; things get complicated when he realizes that he wants to be more than friends. Also with Megan Park, Adam Driver, Mackenzie Davis, Rafe Spall, Lucius Hoyos, Jemima Rooper. Directed by Michael Dowse. [1:42 - PG-13]

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Let's Be Cops - 6.6.8

Two roommates in their 30s have few prospects and are desperate to shake things up a little. When they dress up as police officers for a costume party, they begin to enjoy the role when people actually think they are real cops. But when they confront a violent mobster it's not clear if they'll survive. Also with Jake Johnson, Damon Wayans Jr., Rob Riggle, Nina Dobrev, James D'Arcy, Keegan-Michael Key, Andy Garcia, Jonathan Lajoie, Tom Mardirosian and Natasha Leggero. Directed by Luke Greenfield. [1:44 - R]

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Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles - 2.5.2

All of New York City struggles in the grip of a demented villain (Tohoru Masamune) and his clan until four strange brothers rise from the sewers to become the heroic Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles (Pete Ploszek/voiced by Johnny Knoxville, Alan Ritchson, Noel Fisher and Jeremy Howard). Under the mentorship of their master (Danny Woodburn/voiced by Tony Shalhoub), the Turtles join forces with a reporter (Megan Fox) and her colleague (Will Arnett) to fight the villain's plan. Also with William Fichtner and Minae Noji. Several lines of dialogue are spoken in Japanese, with English subtitles. Directed by Jonathan Liebesman. [1:41 - PG-13]

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The Hundred-Foot Journey - 1.4.2

The Kadam family settles in a charming French village and opens a traditional Indian restaurant. However, the owner of the establishment across the narrow road (Helen Mirren) wants no such competition for her classic French house of haute cuisine and a feud ensues until the Indian family's son (Manish Dayal) falls in love with French cuisine and the restaurant's sous chef (Charlotte Le Bon). Also with Om Puri, Juhi Chawla, Amit Shah and Rohan Chand. Directed by Lasse Hallström. [2:02 - PG]

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Into the Storm - 2.6.4

The story follows a man (Matt Walsh) and his crew in their effort to find and film a massive tornado for a documentary. Also with Richard Armitage, Sarah Wayne Callies, Max Deacon, Nathan Kress, Alycia Debnam Carey, Arlen Escarpeta, Jeremy Sumpter, Lee Whittaker, Kyle Davis and Jon Reep. Directed by Steven Quale. [1:29 - PG-13]

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Boyhood - 5.4.8

Filmed over 12 years, we follow a boy (Ellar Coltrane) as he matures from 7 to 19: His mother (Patricia Arquette) is a working single mom in small-town Texas, she gets married and divorced twice and his father (Ethan Hawke) is mostly absent. Also with Lorelei Linklater, Elijah Smith and Steven Chester Prince. Directed by Richard Linklater. [2:46 - R]

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Guardians of the Galaxy - 3.6.4

The Guardians of the Galaxy are a group of alien humanoid, animal and plant-life misfits on the run. These odd heroes follow a human (Chris Pratt) after he escapes retribution for stealing a magic orb. Almost too late, they discover that the orb is dangerous and that they must save the universe. Also with Zoe Saldana, Dave Bautista, Vin Diesel, Bradley Cooper, Lee Pace, Michael Rooker and Karen Gillan. Directed by James Gunn. [2:01 - PG-13]

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Get on Up - 6.5.5

The story of the turbulent life of the Godfather of Soul, James Brown (Chadwick Boseman), who was abandoned in poverty by his mother (Viola Davis) and later battled financial ruin, drug problems and life in prison. Also with Octavia Spencer, Nelsan Ellis, Lennie James, James Dumont, Dan Aykroyd, Jill Scott, Keith Robinson and Tika Sumter. Directed by Tate Taylor. [2:18 - PG-13]

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Wish I Was Here - 6.4.8

A stressed out actor (Zach Braff) is searching for his identity. Struggling financially, he daydreams, imagining himself as a superhero, while attempting to homeschool his children after his father (Mandy Patinkin) can no longer pay for their private school. Also with Kate Hudson, Joey King, Pierce Gagnon and Josh Gad. The film has some dialogue in Hebrew with English subtitles. Directed by Braff. [1:45 - R]

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Magic in the Moonlight - 2.2.3

In 1928 on the French Riviera a British illusionist (Colin Firth) determines to expose an American psychic (Emma Stone) as a charlatan. Instead of satisfaction, the magician has a chain of magical experiences that cause onlookers to wonder about rationalism vs. the supernatural. Also with Marcia Gay Harden, Simon McBurney, Hamish Linklater and Jacki Weaver. Directed by Woody Allen. [1:40 - PG-13]

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Hercules - 5.7.5

Dwayne Johnson stars as the legendary Greek strongman, recruited by the king of Thrace to save the people from an opposing army. Also with, Ian McShane, John Hurt, Rufus Sewell, Aksel Hennie, Ingrid Bolsø Berdal, Reece Ritchie, Joseph Fiennes, Tobias Santelmann, Peter Mullan and Rebecca Ferguson. Directed by Brett Ratner. [1:39 - PG-13]

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Lucy - 4.7.4

A mob boss forces a woman (Scarlett Johansson) to work as a drug mule in Taiwan. She suffers excruciating abdominal pain and forces medics at gunpoint to remove whatever is causing it, but the drug she carried has already leaked into her body, causing major neurological changes that give her superhuman powers. Also with Morgan Freeman, Choi Min-sik and Amr Waked. Directed by Luc Besson. The film includes French, German, Italian and Chinese dialogue with English subtitles. [1:28 - R]

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I Origins - 6.5.5

A molecular biologist (Michael Pitt) and his lab assistant (Brit Marling) study all aspects of the human eye with interesting findings. The results flirt with the ideas of having a soul and an afterlife and arguments erupt. Also with Astrid Berges-Frisbey, Steven Yeun, Archie Panjabi, Cara Seymour and William Mapother. Directed by Mike Cahill. [1:47 - R]

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And So It Goes - 3.2.4

An aging realtor (Michael Douglas) is obnoxious and self-centered, and his only aim is to sell one more expensive house and retire. However, his estranged son drops off a granddaughter he never knew (Sterling Jerins) and unable to relate to a nine-year-old girl, gives her to his friendly neighbor (Diane Keaton). Also with Paloma Guzmán, Frances Sternhagen and Frankie Valli. Directed by Rob Reiner. [1:34 - PG-13]

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Planes: Fire and Rescue - 1.3.1

Animated feature about a world-renowned air racer (voiced by Dane Cook) who finds his gearbox damaged beyond repair and he chooses a new profession: firefighting. He joins a helicopter (voiced by Ed Harris) and a diverse team (voiced by Julie Bowen, Wes Studi and Dale Dye), along with all-terrain vehicles (voiced by Regina King, Cori English, Bryan Callen, Danny Pardo and Matt Jones). Also with Hal Holbrook, Stacey Keach, Danny Mann, Brad Garrett and Teri Hatcher. Directed by Roberts "Bobs" Gannaway. [1:23 - PG]

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Sex Tape - 9.4.10

A suburban couple (Cameron Diaz and Jason Segel) have a happy life with their young children, until they discover that a private sex tape they made has disappeared. They find it on a cloud network and fear their children and the neighbors will see it if they cannot think of a way to remove it. Also with Rob Corddry, Ellie Kemper, Rob Lowe, Nat Faxon and Jack Black. Directed by Jake Kasdan. [1:35 - R]

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The Purge: Anarchy - 4.7.9

In 2023 the Spring equinox night is when anyone in the US can commit a crime without penalty. A man and a woman (Zach Gilford and Kiele Sanchez) drive toward a relative's house in Los Angeles to hide, but they run out of gas and flee on foot from masked men, another man (Frank Grillo) goes to the streets to seek revenge on the man who killed his son, and a mother and daughter (Carmen Ejogo and Zoe Soul) run away after someone attacks them in their own home. Also with Michael K. Williams and Nicholas Gonzalez. Directed by James DeMonaco. [1:44 - R]

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Dawn of the Planet of the Apes - 1.7.5

In this sequel a community of humanoid apes confronts internal and external opposition when a group of human survivors from a deadly virus outbreak threatens their dominion. The two factions establish a tentative peace, but apes and humans prepare for a war to gain dominance of the Earth. With Andy Serkis, Jason Clarke, Keri Russell, Gary Oldman, Toby Kebbell, Kodi Smit-McPhee, Nick Thurston, Judy Greer and Kirk Acevedo. Directed by Matt Reeves. Dialogue includes Simian sign language and English subtitles. [2:10 - PG-13]

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Third Person - 7.5.6

Paris, Rome and New York City are all home to romantic couples suffering uncertainty, betrayal and heartbreak: A Pulitzer Prize winner and a younger woman (Liam Neeson and Olivia Wilde) play house in Paris, while a white collar criminal falls for a Roma woman (Adrien Brody and Moran Atias) plagued by a kidnapping. Meanwhile, an American soap opera has-been fights for visitation rights with her son against her famous artist ex-husband (Mila Kunis and James Franco). Also with Kim Basinger, Maria Bello and Loan Chabanol. Directed by Paul Haggis. [2:17 - R]

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Deliver Us from Evil - 3.7.7

The story follows an NYPD detective (Eric Bana) in the Bronx, as he's approached by a priest (Edgar Ramirez) who insists on helping with a case he feels it involves demonic possession. Together, they work to solve the case and confront many instances of paranormal intrigue. Also with Sean Harris, Olivia Munn and Joel McHale. Directed by Scott Derrickson. [1:58 - R]

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Earth to Echo - 1.3.4

The lives of three boys (Brian "Astro" Bradley, Reese Hartwig and Teo Halm) implode when a highway development begins to demolish their Nevada homes. They pack up for separate lives elsewhere, but just before moving they begin receiving cryptic distress signals on their cell phones and convinced that the highway construction is a government cover-up, the boys ask their friend (Ella Wahlestedt) to join them as they hunt down the origin of the signals. Also with Jason Gray-Stanford and Cassius Willis. Directed by Dave Green. [1:29 - PG]

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Tammy - 5.4.8

A woman (Melissa McCarthy) who wants a new life, wrecks her old car and loses her job at the local indigestible burger chain. Worse yet, at home she finds her husband (Nat Faxon) fooling around with a neighbor. Without money or a car, she complains to her alcoholic grandmother (Susan Sarandon), who wants to see Niagara Falls and together they make a new kind of Thelma and Louise. Also with Allison Janney, Toni Collette, Sandra Oh, Dan Aykroyd, Gary Cole and Kathy Bates. Directed by Ben Falcone and Melissa McCarthy. [1:36 - R]

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Transformers: Age of Extinction - 3.7.5

In this fourth installment in the series, when an auto mechanic (Mark Wahlberg) uncovers a severely wounded Autobot, the war they last fought begins again and this time humans are the targets. Also with Stanley Tucci, Kelsey Grammer, Nicola Peltz, Jack Reynor, Titus Welliver, Sophia Myles, Bingbing Li, T.J. Miller and James Bachman. Directed by Michael Bay. [2:45 - PG-13]

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They Came Together - 7.4.5

When a man (Paul Rudd) meets a woman (Amy Poehler), they instantly hate each other since his company intends to shut down her small independent candy shop and he longs for his ex-girlfriend (Cobie Smulders). Nevertheless, the two adversaries fall in love, break up and she dates her milquetoast accountant (Ed Helms). Also with Bill Hader, Ellie Kemper, Max Greenfield and Christopher Meloni. Directed by David Wain. [1:26 - R]

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Begin Again - 4.3.9

A woman (Keira Knightley) and her live-in boyfriend (Adam Levine) write songs. When they move to New York City for his album deal with a leading record label, he abandons her for another woman and corporate-guided success. Heartbroken, she considers fleeing to England, but a recording executive emerging from tough times (Mark Ruffalo) discovers her performing in a club and helps her record her own first album. Also with Catherine Keener, Hailee Steinfeld and James Corden. Directed by John Carney. [1:41 - R]

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The Obvious Child - 6.2.7

A Manhattan standup comic (Jenny Slate) has problems: She jokes on stage and off about her life, even when she finds herself single and jobless. She rebounds in love with an MBA student (Jake Lacy) and then finds herself pregnant, with decisions to make. Also with Gabby Hoffman, Gabe Leidman, David Cross, Richard Kind and Polly Draper. Directed by Gillian Robespierre. [1:24 - R]

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Think Like a Man Too - 6.3.5

In this sequel, inspired by Steve Harvey's book "Act Like a Lady," the original characters gather for the wedding of one of the couples (Terrence Jenkins and Regina Hall) in Las Vegas. However, the friends' actions put them in extremely compromising positions that could ruin the wedding. Also with Kevin Hart, Jennifer Lewis, Michael Ealy, Jeremy Ferrara, Meagan Good, Taraji P. Henson, Gabrielle Union and Romany Malco. Directed by Tim Story. [1:46 - PG-13]

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Jersey Boys - 4.4.8

Three 1950s New Jersey street corner singers (Michael Lomenda, Vincent Piazza and Erich Bergen) recruit Frankie Valli (John Lloyd Young) and become a boy band sensation as The Four Seasons. The film chronicles their rise in the music industry, along with their underworld involvement and family disasters. Also with Christopher Walken, Mike Doyle, Renee Marino and Jeremy Luke. Directed by Clint Eastwood. [2:14 - R]

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The Rover - 4.7.8

A decade after a global economic collapse, a depressed man (Guy Pearce) drives around the scorching Australian outback. Three armed men rob him (David Field, Tawanda Manyimo and Scoot McNairy) and steal his car, but leave behind one of the men's wounded brother (Robert Pattinson). Taking the wounded man hostage, he chases down the thieves on an obsessive road trip. Also with Gillian Jones and Susan Prior. Directed by David Michod. [1:42 - R]

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The Signal - 2.6.5

Two MIT students (Brenton Thwaites and Beau Knapp) dabble in computer hacking, but are not as good as the mysterious NOMAD. While driving cross-country through Nevada with one young man's girlfriend (Olivia Cooke), they follow NOMAD's IP address to a deserted blockhouse on a dirt road, and the friends find themselves in a government laboratory run by a strange doctor (Laurence Fishburne). Also with Lyn Shaye. Directed by William Eubank. [1:35 - PG-13]

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How to Train Your Dragon 2 - 1.3.2

Five years after a Viking boy (voiced by Jay Baruchel) and his dragon (voiced by Randy Thom) unite dragons and Vikings, they discover a secret ice cave and inside, they find thousands of new dragons and a woman (voiced by Cate Blanchett), as well as a cadre of thugs who are dragon trappers working for a madman (voiced by Djimon Hounsou). Also with the voices of Gerard Butler, Craig Ferguson, American Fererra, Kristen Wiig and Jonah Hill. Directed by Dean Deblois. [1:42 - PG]

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22 Jump Street - 5.5.10

In this sequel, the pair of unaccomplished police officers (Jonah Hill and Channing Tatum) are sent on another undercover assignment: this time they go to college to break up a designer drug ring. Also with Peter Stormare, Wyatt Russell, Amber Stevens, Jillian Bell, Ice Cube, The Lucas Brothers, Nick Offerman and Jimmy Tatro. Directed by Phil Lord and Christopher Miller. [1:52 - R]

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The Fault in Our Stars - 4.4.5

Two teenagers with cancer (Shailene Woodley and Ansel Elgort) are witty and nonconformist, and fall in love while attending their cancer support group: She carries an oxygen tank and he jokes about his prosthetic leg through a series of illnesses and adventures. Also with Willem Dafoe, Nat Wolff, Sam Trammell and Laura Dern. Directed by Josh Boone. [2:05 - PG-13]

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Edge of Tomorrow - 2.6.5

As multi-legged aliens take over Europe, a military hero (Emily Blunt) scores a major victory against them, while a US Army PR rep (Tom Cruise) has a mission but he dies in battle. However, alien blood spilled on him triggers a time loop and he reawakens repeatedly on the morning before his death. Also with Bill Paxton and Brendan Gleeson. Directed by Doug Liman. [1:53 - PG-13]

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Words and Pictures - 4.3.5

An English teacher (Clive Owen) works at a New England prep school and is infuriated with students who prefer social media to writing. When an Italian painter (Juliette Binoche) joins the school, she irritates him and the two teachers begin a challenge to determine which is more powerful, writing or painting. Also with Keegan Connor Tracy, Bruce Davison and Amy Brenneman. Directed by Fred Schepisi. [1:51 - PG-13]

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A Million Ways to Die in the West - 7.6.10

A timid sheep rancher (Seth MacFarlane) in 1880s Arizona loses his girl (Amanda Seyfried) when he backs out of a showdown. Meeting a lovely and mysterious woman (Charlize Theron), he develops some courage, but her estranged husband (Liam Neeson) rides into town to make trouble. Also with Sarah Silverman, Neil Patrick Harris, Giovanni Ribisi and Wes Studi. Directed by MacFarlane. A few scenes feature a Native American language or pseudo-language with English subtitles. [1:56 - R]

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Maleficent - 1.4.2

The orphan leader of a group of magical creatures (Angelina Jolie) suffered loss and betrayal that filled her with bitterness and desires for revenge. In retribution, she places an irrevocable curse upon the greedy human king's new baby (Elle Fanning). Also with Sharlto Copley, Sam Riley, Imelda Staunton, Juno Temple and Lesley Manville. Directed by Robert Stromberg. [1:37 - PG]

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Belle - 3.3.2

Inspired by a Caribbean slave (Gugu Mbatha-Raw), the film follows the life of the illegitimate daughter of a slave and a British Admiral (Mathew Goode). Raised by her great-uncle (Tom Wilkinson), she is privileged, yet still considered beneath whites in social standing. Not permitted to seek suitors, she draws them anyway and meets a vicar's son (Sam Reid) who intends to change 18th century British law and society to end slavery in England. Also with Emily Watson, Sarah Gadon, Miranda Richardson and Penelope Wilton. Directed by Amma Asante. [1:45 - PG]

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Moms' Night Out - 1.3.2

A stressed-to-the-limit mother plans a night out with two other moms, hoping that it will help her to find a bit of happiness. The night devolves into one frustration after another with a stolen car, a missing baby, a drive across town to a tattoo parlor and a lockup in the local jail. With Sarah Drew, Sean Astin, Patricia Heaton, Trace Adkins, David Hunt, Logan White, Harry Shum Jr., Abbie Cobb, Robert Amaya, Kevin Downes, Alex Kendrick and Sammi Hanratty. Directed by Andrew Erwin & Jon Erwin. [1:38 - PG]

[complete content analysis]


X-Men: Days of Future Past  - 3.7.5

Wolverine (Hugh Jackman) is sent to the past to correct a situation that has caused a series of events leaving the planet at war. Also with Ian McKellen, Patrick Stewart, James McAvoy, Michael Fassbender, Jennifer Lawrence, Halle Berry, Nicholas Hoult, Anna Paquin, Ellen Page, Peter Dinklage, Shawn Ashmore, Omar Sy, Evan Peters and Josh Helman. Directed by Bryan Singer. [2:11 - PG-13]

[complete content analysis]


Blended - 5.3.4

After suffering through a blind date, a man and a woman (Adam Sandler and Drew Barrymore) find themselves on an African vacation together with their families and they discover that they each have more to offer than first impressions may have revealed. Also with Kevin Nealon, Terry Crews, Wendi McLendon-Covey, Bella Thorne, Alyvia Alyn Lind, Joel McHale, Abdoulaye NGom, Kyle Red Silverstein, Zak Henri, Jessica Lowe, Braxton Beckham, Shaquille O'Neal and Emma Fuhrmann. Directed by Frank Coraci. [1:57 - PG-13]

[complete content analysis]


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